I’ve been in enough interviews to know they’re easy
You only walk in,
Describe yourself non-traditionally
Smile, as much as you can (not creepily)
Speak, try not to stammer
Exaggerate some
Make up things as you answer
And be careful not to stare at the pretty lady interviewing you

But turns out,
If you decide to be honest (like, real honest)
It’s rather complicated

You see,
Ms. Whoeveryouare from HR,
I don’t know what I was put on this earth to do
I’ve spent the better part of my last 25 years trying to figure it out
But every time I discovered how small I was
Compared to the sky I wanted to reach,
And how far the clouds,
I deemed it pointless
And went for a drink instead.

I don’t know what my dreams are anymore
Or should I even pursue them
Because every time I think about them
I’m reminded how I ran after a love
But never even came close.

I don’t have a sense of direction,
‘Cause I have my bags packed, ready to go
But I know not where…
So, they stay by my door
Where I see it every day catching dust
I’m told about a world that waits outside
But I know the open sky is useless to flightless birds

No,
I don’t know how much of value I will add to this place
Because I’m still searching for my own self-worth,
For it is too much to live,
Knowing that all my projects, loves, and lifetimes are limited
And when that is gone,
It’ll be as though I never was

Also, I’ve been trying not to stare
At your…err…(eyes?),
For the last 20 minutes
And wondering whether it’d be out of season
To botch this interview and ask you out to dinner instead

People think of me
The way they think of coffee
You see, you think it’s fundamental for you to function properly,
But…you can do without it.

P.S.: You can always drink tea instead.

Any questions?

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